I'm Broken AND Put Back Together

I am on an airplane from Santiago, Dominican Republic on my way to Atlanta for the Catalyst Conference.  I have a stop over in San Juan, Puerto Rico.  Heidi and I will be meeting up to attend the conference that will cover a bunch of different things, from Passion, Influence, Justice, Community in the context of being young leaders.  I will write more about this later, but know that we are very excited about this opportunity to learn from others in the Kingdom.

But what I really want to write about is how God has touched my heart today.  When I sat down on the plane I turned on my iPod and the first song was by Hillsong, "For who you are".  The chorus is:

I will worship you for who you are

I will worship you for who you are

I will worship you for who you are, Jesus

Standing here in your presence

Thinking of all the good things you have done...

Holy, Righteous, Faithful to the end

Savior, Healer, Redeemer and Friend

and during this chorus I started to ask myself if I was worshiping Jesus, in my life, for who he is and I just started to break down and cry.  He is all those things in the song, and more. But he only needs to be one of them for me to honor him, a Holy Savior. Have I honored Him?  It's a good thing my seat is in the last row and I'm by myself. I don't cry much.

I sat there convicted.  All the things I've said or done in the last few weeks have been done with pride.  Not the good kind of pride either.  Gosh, why do I have to struggle with my flesh so much!  I'm crying out in my heart to God that I am sorry.  Sorry for not acknowledging His "omni"-presence, for blatantly ignoring His presence.  Sorry that I've lost focus of His Cross, even as I'm telling others to focus on it! 

He's saying back to me through His word, "I Forgive You". God loves me.  He loves all His children dearly and wants them to confess.  He will take care of it; he already has, actually, with the blood of Jesus.  He changes our hearts.  He is changing mine.  Praise be to God.

Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven whose sin is covered.  Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit.

For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.  For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer.

I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the Lord," and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Psalm 32:1-5